The Class Test

20 scripts: 3 mediocre passes, 17 failures.

It's hard not to be depressed after marking. Questions and doubts always abound.
Where did I go wrong?
Was the paper too hard?
Were questions ambiguous?
Why did some give up?

Then again, as I look through the scripts, I'm thankful for the careful dedication to details some of my students poured in; annotations, highlights, interpretations.

I'm thankful that everyone of them turned up for the class test. Only two gave up midway and started answering 'I don't know' or leaving questions blank. Almost all gave concerted efforts to put down answers using their own words, and therefore show effort in understanding the passage instead of simple blind copying from the text.

That is victory.

Flabbergasted

Today was yet another day, where I had to adjust my thinking.

I'd like to think that I'm a pretty open person, open to new ideas and thinkings. Yet I realised today again, that I'm also another mere human, with preconceptions and assumptions.

So when I'm confronted with a reality check - I was flabbergasted. Again and yet again today.

I really have to change my thinking and realise AGAIN that people develop skills and abilities at a different rate; some alarmingly slower than others, some pleasantly faster than others. It's a lesson worth repeating.

Moreover besides skills and abilities but understanding, social skills, and what some of us think as simply 'maturity'.

I have however, come to realise that what we view as 'maturity' or 'common sense' is not that easily gained or transmitted. Sigh... patience, I need more patience and the ability to explain with the right words.

All that one learns in Uni, needs to be relearned in working life - especially when your occupation is so relational.

Everyday is a brand new day

I'm resolved to think this everyday and be grateful:

Everyday is a brand new day.

So I can change from yesterday.
I can believe in the impossible because one will never know what possibilities today may have.

It's the weekend

And my brain is on my students.

This is ridiculous. After only 5 days, how can they occupy my thoughts so much?

I go to sleep wondering if they will turn up for class, if they'll hand up the homework, if they understood me, if I was too fierce, should I have said things differently?

Urghed.

My feet still aches and I feel guilty thinking that I've neglected my loved ones already.

Grumpy grumpy.

This was a tiring day

Tiring partly because I made many mistakes.

Was late for three meetings, could not go for orchestra rehearsal, forgot some tasks, felt like vomiting etc...

In general, I'm feeling a little overwhelmed.

After the 1st day of work

My many emotions on the 1st day at work...

Uh.... What?

??

grrr....

(Stifled laughter)

GRYAAHHHH!!!!!

HWHAT??!

Sobz

Sigh...

Ooooh...

Humans sure are capable of many mixed feelings.