I have been crafting

Counting down 5 days before I leave the school for teachers' college! There's not enough time to make one for all the people I want to thank, motivate, encourage... basically leave a momento behind.

Relief Class

This is a great show to talk about history! Fighting Spiders is about growing up in Singapore during the 1960s. My relief classes never fail to be riveted. They get pretty bored when the plot focuses on the parent and child relationships, but the funny moments capturing the boys' playing antics are always the most popular.

When I tell them that the things they saw in the show really did happened, and bring their attention to the use of water basins (Sanitation system, water rationing), sitting on the road (Entrepreneurship), triads (Colonial governance, youth crimes, syndicates), and even the food the boys eat with their families (meritocracy), the students' eyes grow bigger! LOL! I love young minds.

7pm in school

There's no deeper statement than 'I'm a pretty pony'.

I feel like a dino

I've watched The Truth About Killer Dinosaurs way too many times. All credit due to the continual relief classes I took and a severe lack of imagination on relief teaching. Just bumping into a furniture gave me visions of having Triceratops hips. I am also able to whistle some of the background music from the documentary. I need new DVDs for relief teaching.

Hidden

After a long day of marking, my colleagues and I decided to treat ourselves.

Since that day, I've not had the chance to show off these peepers except on weekends.

Maybe it's the consciousness to role model to students, or just simple unwillingness to open this can of worms.

I've been quiet.

I've been very quiet online. So the question is, have I been cruising or drowning in my career as a teacher? Currently, I'm happy to report that I've been coping well and am still looking forward to a fruitful career in teaching. My government should be well pleased to know that this recruit at least, has little to complain about and is enthusiastic about her vocation.

I wanted to start off my blog with the title, "My students have no life." That, however, is not exactly the most optimistic sentence in this sea of negativity my students are living in. Nonetheless, as I mark composition after composition, I am convinced that this generation needs help: to find meaning to life, to live fruitfully, to have life. To plainly speak, someone needs to teach this generation how to have fun.

Take for example what one 14 year old student writes (grammatically edited) :

The television is my life. I have been watching television since I was young so
the television is very important to me.

To be honest, I really wanted to cry when I read this statement. One might be consoling and say that young people are prone to exaggeration and have little understanding in enormity. Yet, knowing the power of words, I can't help but wonder how my students see themselves.

The way into a teacher's heart

Believe it or not, the way into a teacher's heart is not through flattery, but a self concious effort to recognise one's own flaws and work on them.

As a teacher, I cannot help but smile when realization and understanding dawns upon the faces of my students. The sheepish smiles and the subsequent determination not the make the same mistake again always makes my day.

Then again, it would not be harmful to write a good story about an inspiring teacher. Good stories are not designed to flatter nor do they have inconsequential examples, but are stories that cause the marking teacher to pause and reflect (even for a short 2 seconds during her busy marking).

In addition, as a plea to all students, try not to begin your sentences with 'And' or 'But' and never 'Because', not matter what you read on the Internet.

P.S. This was obviously done after marking Common Test scripts.

Why so different?

My students noted and subsequently asked, "Teacher, how come only NT students must go listen to police talk?"

The school had invited the police to give a talk on the dangers of drug abuse, and only the NT students were singled out to attend the talk.

My spirit sank as I struggled to give my students an answer. I could not explain to them that when they were slotted into the different streams, they were not only categorised simply by their academic ability but were also accorded labels on their behaviour and tendencies.

I wanted to tell them that though many of them came from broken families, had non existent guardians, and lived in poorer circumstances (as compared to the majority), it did not mean that they would most likely be people who commit crimes or took drugs. It also did not mean that all their friends were deviant criminals.

Yet, despite my will to believe in them, I knew that there are sociological links. At times like this, I feel really helpless.

Postscript: Great, when the students were asked if they knew of any friends or family members who had taken drugs before, hands were raised all across the auditorium. So thankful for the police officer who told them that drug users come from all walks of life, and are of all ages.

Two months

It's going to be two months since I started teaching.

I'm still trying to separate work from the personal. The key word is 'trying'.

I can't help but be reminded of my students, especially the naughty, energy sapping ones. I try distract my mind by watching television, playing computer games, or occupying myself with other activities like church matters, music matters etc. It does not work.

I awake with a sick feeling in my stomach. A classic symptom of stress.

I refocus my mind, and think positive thoughts like, "Today's a new day!", "Yesterday's baggages are yesterday's!", and "I LOVE my students! Warts and all."

Admittedly, it's just easier to sigh, be weary, be dejected, and give up.

But how can I possibly give up? I can't help but see a bit of myself in everyone of my students. And I'm reminded everyday of the second chances I have received and I am being given. So I have been given, so I can give.

The Class Test

20 scripts: 3 mediocre passes, 17 failures.

It's hard not to be depressed after marking. Questions and doubts always abound.
Where did I go wrong?
Was the paper too hard?
Were questions ambiguous?
Why did some give up?

Then again, as I look through the scripts, I'm thankful for the careful dedication to details some of my students poured in; annotations, highlights, interpretations.

I'm thankful that everyone of them turned up for the class test. Only two gave up midway and started answering 'I don't know' or leaving questions blank. Almost all gave concerted efforts to put down answers using their own words, and therefore show effort in understanding the passage instead of simple blind copying from the text.

That is victory.

Flabbergasted

Today was yet another day, where I had to adjust my thinking.

I'd like to think that I'm a pretty open person, open to new ideas and thinkings. Yet I realised today again, that I'm also another mere human, with preconceptions and assumptions.

So when I'm confronted with a reality check - I was flabbergasted. Again and yet again today.

I really have to change my thinking and realise AGAIN that people develop skills and abilities at a different rate; some alarmingly slower than others, some pleasantly faster than others. It's a lesson worth repeating.

Moreover besides skills and abilities but understanding, social skills, and what some of us think as simply 'maturity'.

I have however, come to realise that what we view as 'maturity' or 'common sense' is not that easily gained or transmitted. Sigh... patience, I need more patience and the ability to explain with the right words.

All that one learns in Uni, needs to be relearned in working life - especially when your occupation is so relational.

Everyday is a brand new day

I'm resolved to think this everyday and be grateful:

Everyday is a brand new day.

So I can change from yesterday.
I can believe in the impossible because one will never know what possibilities today may have.

After the 1st day of work

My many emotions on the 1st day at work...

Uh.... What?

??

grrr....

(Stifled laughter)

GRYAAHHHH!!!!!

HWHAT??!

Sobz

Sigh...

Ooooh...

Humans sure are capable of many mixed feelings.